One of the most difficult aspects of being a parent is helping your children to honor you. In many cases, parents find that it’s easier to be honorable members of society and model good behavior, where they can both teach by example and encourage their kids to do the right thing.
How To Honor Your Parents When They Are Not Honorable
However, there are situations where parents aren’t as honorable as they might like to be. This could go either way: they could be terrible people who are actively harming their kids, or they could just not be perfect (and may never have been). Regardless of how your specific case lines up with these examples, though, the implications are clear: it’s much harder for a child to honor his or her parents when one (or both) of them isn’t exactly very honorable themselves. There is also the possibility that you had an absent parent throughout your life; in this case, honoring his/her memory may seem even more difficult than if he or she was present during your childhood. But honoring our parents doesn’t have to mean sweeping things under the rug; we can still honor them despite their flaws and mistakes in life!
The Bible says quite a bit about children honoring their fathers and mothers—but it doesn’t always address what we should do when our parents aren’t very honorable themselves. So today I’m going over some things that all Christians need to know about honoring those who raised us—even if those people weren’t exactly perfect human beings all along! When done right with God’s help at its center point? Honoring Mommy Dearest gets much easier…
Parents are not perfect, and it can be incredibly confusing when parents do things that are not honorable.
It can be hard to honor your parents when they are not honorable. As a child, you are taught to do as your parents say, and in many cases it is expected that you will obey them no matter how unreasonable their demands may seem. Unfortunately, many children find themselves in situations where their parent’s behavior is abusive or neglectful.
Parents often do not realize that they can be abusive, neglectful or selfish. They believe that what they are doing is best for their children and assume that by making decisions as a parent it will help them become successful adults who can take care of themselves later on down the line. Unfortunately this isn’t always true because sometimes our actions have consequences (good or bad) which affect us throughout our lives whether it’s learning how to cook dinner alone without burning down the house like I did once (don’t ask why), having an awkward conversation with someone who looked at me funny for wearing all black clothes every day during summer break two years ago…etcetera etcetera ad nauseam ad infinitum!
There is a difference between honoring parents and idolizing them.
When I talk about honoring your parents, this is not the same as idolizing them. The Bible says to honor your father and mother, but it doesn’t say to make them your idols. In fact, if you do that, it’s likely that you will end up being an idol worshiper in all aspects of your life because everything becomes about pleasing them and making sure they are happy with you.
When we honor our parents, we’re doing what God has commanded us to do. When we idolize our parents though, we’re putting someone else before God (Deuteronomy 6:5). We should treat our family members with respect and kindness at all times—that’s part of loving them (Ephesians 5:4). But if their behavior is harmful or sinful toward us or others around us then there comes a point where we have to take action for their sake as well as ours.
Understand what the Bible says about honoring your father and mother.
The Bible is clear that we are to honor our parents. In fact, in Matthew 15:4-6, Jesus gives us a direct command to do so. Yet this does not mean that you should always obey your parents or even agree with them.
Honor is not merely obedience; it’s a choice to show love and respect for another person regardless of their behavior toward you
Honor is not equal to obedience.
Honoring your parents is not the same as obeying them. You can honor your parents by standing up for yourself, or by setting boundaries with them, even if they don’t like it. Honoring your parents does not mean that you have to follow their advice or example if it goes against what God says in His Word.
Honor and respect are not synonymous words either. A person can be honored without being respected, because respect requires more than just giving someone attention or praise for reasons other than their character and actions (think about how we treat celebrities). However, honoring one’s parent involves showing them respect based on their character and actions because of an obligation that comes from a relationship with them (the father/mother role).
Consider the impact of your parents’ actions on your life.
As you consider the impact of your parents’ actions on your life, remember that they are not perfect. They may have made mistakes and may make more in the future. If so, it is important to remember that honoring your parents does not mean obeying them blindly.
Honoring your parents does not require you to believe everything they say or take their advice at face value. You can still honor them even if their words and actions hurt you or others around you—but only if doing so will help achieve what matters most: building a good relationship with them over time as an adult child who cares about them deeply.
You can honor your parents even if they aren’t perfect people
It’s important to remember that honoring your parents doesn’t mean being loyal to them, or forgiving them when they have done wrong. It doesn’t mean obeying them blindly, or idolizing them as perfect beings.
Honoring your parents means treating their needs as your own: sharing their burdens and responsibilities, making yourself available for their needs in the same way you would be for anyone else with whom you are close.
We hope this post has helped you to understand what it means to honor your parents. We know it’s not easy, especially if you’ve experienced trauma. Honoring someone is about acknowledging their value and worth in life, and being grateful for the good things they have done for you. This does not mean idolizing them or pretending that nothing bad happened. It means being thankful for the good things they did, while also seeking healing and forgiveness from the damage that was done.